Christian dating issues
Nothing in my life and faith has been more confusing and spiritually hazardous than my pursuit of marriage. Maybe you’ve wanted the relationship or liked the guy or girl, and you’ve never had the chance.From far too young, I longed for the affection, safety, and intimacy I anticipated with a wife. I experimented too much with our hearts and allowed things to go too far. And now my singleness is a regular reminder that I messed up, missed opportunities, or did it wrong. Maybe all the suggestions and advice you’ve collected has become a confusing mess of good-intentioned contradictions and ambiguity.Apart from questions of attraction and chemistry, which are not insignificant, the Bible articulates some roles for wives and husbands.A husband ought to protect and provide for his wife (Ephesians –29).Regardless of the believer you marry, you will likely find out soon that you do not feel as “compatible” as you once did, but hopefully you will marvel more at God’s love for you in Jesus and the amazing privilege it is to live out that love together, especially in light of your differences.In our worst moments, our objectives are small and misguided.If low-commitment sexual promiscuity sounds like freedom, we don’t get it.Jesus may ask more of us, but he does so to secure and increase our greatest and longest-lasting (sexual) happiness.
After all, there has never been a less compatible relationship than a holy God and his sinful bride, and that’s the mold we’re aiming for in our marriages.
For those whose roads are marked more by mistakes than selflessness, patience, and sound judgment, take hope in the God who truly and mysteriously blesses your broken road and redeems you from it, and who can begin in you a new, pure, wise, godly pursuit of marriage today.
Here are (some) principles for your not-yet marriages.
Don’t sit around waiting for a boy to make you a priority, communicate his intentions, or even call you on the phone. And this God created and rules his world, including men, women, the biological compulsions that bind them together, and the institution that declares their union and keeps it sacred and safe.
Girls, stop expecting guys to make any formal attempt at winning your affections.
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Sadly, my immature and unhealthy desires predictably did much more harm than good. Maybe dating has been hard for you too, for these reasons or others. It’s enough to leave you like an eight-year-old, asking, “Mom, where do weddings come from?