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A German pediatrician's turn-of-the-century opus on the subject discouraged long walks and long periods of sitting. (Aside from setting an egg timer.) For seemingly incurable cases, "a canvas vest with a metal cup over the genitals" was recommended.Other pediatricians recommended small bells, attached to a child's hands during the night, to warn parents of any untoward hand movements.Back-buttoned pajamas were recommended." If nothing ever touched the pelvic region, the child might simply never notice anything was there.

As the sociologist Steven Ward has noted, by establishing masturbation as a deeply worrying, deeply important problem, psychologists established themselves as an indispensible authority.Ever wonder how those Abercrombie & Fitch models manage to look so constantly cool and relaxed while tossing around a football in their skivvies?Turns out achieving that relaxed look can get pretty stressful: One A&F model is accusing his modeling agent of forcing him to play with something else--and let's just say, it didn't involve pigskin.Just like PP said, inserting things is not recommended for 6 weeks in case of infection. Seriously, you're not going to want to or even have the desire for quite a while. You're going to be so sleep deprived and hormonal from being a new mom that your sex drive will be nil! We tend to fool ourselves into thinking that our worries are the right worries.

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(Yes, we're talking about masturbation here.)Here's what (allegedly!

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