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It backfires on a woman too, when the sensitive, thoughtful man she wished for starts looking soft and ineffective in her eyes. If you are into attraction research, like I am, you can read some of these studies out of the links above.Men who do good deeds for others enjoy more relationships, more sex partners and are deemed more desirable by women. Not so fast, there is a hidden downside to being so nice and accommodating.As a result of this, I have been told by many of my ex girlfriends (I am one of those people who has remained friends with almost all his exes) that I broke their hearts and I was “the guy that got away” for them.
She never called me a pussy to my face, but perhaps she thought it.On the other hand, while I knew her husband less well, he was a great guy.Some years later he and she split up, and I remember thinking that one conversation had telegraphed the entire relationship.He was, by all measures, a “good guy.”He loved his kids and was a devoted father.She even said he treated her great, and he was kind and pleasant to people.